“Something In the Way She Moves…”
I’m a male boudoir photographer and I’m gonna’ let you in on a little secret. Being “sexy” has very little to do with how “beautiful” you look, or having the “perfect” body and has everything to do with how you move, your vibe, and your smile.
I’ve photographed some very beautiful women who had absolutely nothing to give when in front of the camera and they came across as flat, boring, and unappealing.
And then I’ve photographed women who would be considered average but were sexy as hell because of how they moved, or just their essence, or had this amazing smile.
I know for a lot of women that if a man has confidence and holds himself a certain way, that is far more attractive than a pretty boy with no personality.Shaping Swimwear Featuring Magicsuit + Free 2-Day Shipping & Free Returns
A Perfect Example
I was once on a beach where a woman was walking along the shoreline in a bikini who was probably about 15 to 20 pounds overweight by today’s standards, with average looks.
Now, not a sight that would draw the undivided attention of most men but for some reason this woman had all male eyes locked on her… and she was totally unaware.
Men were transfixed as they saw her coming down the beach and remained staring at her until she was well on her way.
They could not take their eyes off her, and you know why?
It was because of her walk… it was the way she swung her hips from side to side with a little swivel of her waist. It was hypnotic, it was feminine, it was sexy, and it struck a primal chord within each man who was witness to it.
A lot of women today, regardless of size, walk stiff and straight. So, when I talk about how a woman can be sexy, it can be in how she moves.
Now, although your movement in a boudoir session isn’t captured fluidly on video, it is captured as individual moments that are frozen in time with a single image.
Knowing how to move, stand, sit, kneel, and lay in a sexy manner is key to coming across sexy in your boudoir images which results in having an emotional impact on the viewer.
Granted, you need to work with a photographer who understands all this and who can guide you accordingly, otherwise you’ll end up with a bunch of pictures of just what you look like in lingerie — it’ll be one-dimensional.
Sexy Is In the Eyes
Anyone can look sexy with the right look in their eyes. Granted, it may not come naturally to some but with coaching from a photographer who knows how to utilize this technique, any woman can look sexy.
It’s been referred to by some as “spy eyes” or “the squinch” where you’re kind of squinting as if trying to focus on something in the distance. Combined with a sly smile, this can be a lethal combination for a sexy look.
What’s in the eyes, along with a naughty smile and the thought of a lustful secret, is the trifecta of achieving a sexually charged expression.
The Sexy Mind/Body Infusion
There’s more to a pose than just holding your body in a certain position. In order for it to come alive as being sexy, it needs to be infused with the proper mindset or attitude. This mental state serves as the pose’s internal support or fuel and kicks the pose up to another level.
It starts in the mind, a thought or remembering a pleasurable experience, which then manifests itself in your facial expression and body.
I learned of this method while studying acting in Los Angeles years ago.
If a scene required you to be in a happy mood, you didn’t “act” happy, but rather you thought about a really happy time in your life and then had that memory affect you as it would naturally.
The result would be that you’re not “acting”, but rather really experiencing a happy moment which was then used as the emotional foundation from which to perform the scene.
The technique was called Emotional Memory.
So, a big part of being “sexy” in a boudoir shoot needs to happen in your mind first, whether real or fantasized, which then expresses itself through your expression and body.
Smiles Are Sexy… Period!
Smiling makes a woman attractive and sexy, and combined with the right look in her eyes, you’ve got yourself one heck of a sexy mama.
Using one’s smile in a boudoir shoot is a sure-fire way to achieve a sexy look and men love it! (By the way, men love shots of women smiling more than women love shots of men smiling.)
Personally for me, a male boudoir photographer, I love it when my clients smile and I always try to get them to smile if they’re having a hard time with it.
This often takes the form of just chatting with them during the shoot and then over the course of the conversation I’ll eventually say something that will make them laugh or smile and I grab some shots.
I did this all the time during my headshot days when actors needed a smiling commercial headshot. I couldn’t stand forced or phony smiles because you could always tell when they weren’t genuine so I’d work with them, talking about anything while shooting, which would eventually lead us to saying something that would make us both smile — then I’d snap away.
As you can see being “sexy” for your boudoir shoot is just a matter of learning a few simple techniques. Actors do this all the time when filming a movie that requires them to be sexy in a scene.
You can learn these simple methods on your own, or you can work with a boudoir photographer who is well-versed in these techniques who can coach and guide you every step of the way.
Thanks for your time!
“Being sexy is all about attitude, not body type. It’s a state of mind.” — Amisha Patel